


It's Been A While

by subspacepastry



Category: Star Wars Prequel Trilogy
Genre: F/M, Forbidden Love, Friendship/Love, Gray Jedi, Jedi, Jedi Code, Jedi Knights, Jedi Temple, Jedi Training, Old Friends, Reunions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-13
Updated: 2016-05-13
Packaged: 2018-06-08 03:30:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,095
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6837424
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/subspacepastry/pseuds/subspacepastry
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Qui-Gon Jinn and yourself have been old friends, dating back to your days as padawans. Still, just like him, you disagreed with plenty of the Council’s ‘rules and regulations’, eventually leaving the Jedi Order to persue your own path as a Gray Jedi. So technically… It wasn’t against the rules for you to fall in love.</p>
            </blockquote>





	It's Been A While

The Force was a mysterious concept, even bringing about a sense of wonder to you, even years after leaving the Order.

It knew no bounds, empowering the lives and livelihoods of others, fueling their ambitions for whatever side they walk upon, even for those who choose to not even pick a side.

A basic understanding of the Force is what the Jedi taught, focusing on the path of righteousness and Light. You didn’t mind that. It was the path of good, to eradicate the evils of this galaxy.

However, the glaring problem that stood out to you was the restriction of feeling, of desire. For the Jedi are all living, organic beings, who understand emotion and choose to hide it, burying it beneath them as they fought evil as though they were droids with flesh and blood.

You and Qui-Gon knew how your fate would turn out a long time ago, and there were no qualms when you decided to persue your own path, free from the binds and boundaries of the Jedi Council.

* * *

“My my, back so soon? You’re starting to get old, Qui-Gon.” You noted, opening the door and being greeted by his presence..

“I don’t believe you have a right to talk, Y/N, considering that the Force doesn’t stop the aging process for anyone.” He chuckled, hugging you in an attempt to make up for the lost time you’ve spent apart.

“Still as snarky as when we were padawans, I see. Come in, Qui-Gon. It’s been quite a while since we’ve last spoken.” You held the door to your cottage open, as he slightly ducked underneath the doorframe.

“How is your padawan? Obi-Wan, I believe his name was.” You asked, closing the door and making your way to the kitchen to prepare a nice pot of tea as he sat down at the chair by your fireplace.

Qui-Gon smiled, raising his voice only ever-so-slightly to speak over the sound of boiling water. “He’s got plenty of potential. I’ve never seen so much Light in a padawan before. He’s so concerned about what the ‘Council’ would think, though.

You chuckled, finishing the drinks and joining your long-time friend at the mantle, giving him a mug of tea. “If he’s got as much potential as you say he does, I say let him be a stickler for the rules. The Order would benefit from the boy if he’s so pure of heart.”

The two of you smiled, taking small sips of the warm drinks and catching up after such a long time apart, telling tales and escapades of smugglers and criminals that you’ve faced off against.

* * *

“So…” Qui-Gon paused, taking another light sip of tea as you waited patiently. “Why did you want to quit the Jedi Order, Y/N?”

“I’ve told you before, Jinn. Have you not been paying attention?” You teased, as the man shook his head, laughing softly.

“Do enlighten me, dear. After all, age is beginning to take effect.”

You set down your mug on the table, leaning back into your chair. “Well, I’d have to say it was the lack of emotion. The ideals that surrounded the prohibition of love, mainly.”

“Why ‘love’, though?” Qui-Gon sat up, looking upon you with a new-found glimmer in his eyes.

“You know I’ve always been a hopeless romantic, Qui-Gon. Even when we met as padawans, I’ve always been like that.”

“Ah, yes.” He smiled, reminiscing on your younger days together. “You would twirl around the training room, talking of the Force bringing kindred souls together.”

“So you do remember. I’d have assumed you’d forget about my past antics.” You smiled, the fireplace illuminating the two of you in a warm glow of dancing oranges and yellows.

“Y/N, I would never forget your little quirks.” He spoke over the crackling of fire as you blushed.

“Well, back to your original question. I believe it was the whole situation of channeling every aspect of yourself into the Order. When, personally, I was a rather emotional woman. I have emotions like any other living being, and I believed that suppressing those desires and longings was not worth it for me, if it meant fighting for a good cause at the expense of the very culmination of my nature.”

Qui-Gon’s expression softened into one of contentment, as he finished off his tea. “So, you decided to leave. It’s rather self-fulfilling, if I do say so myself.”

“It was what I wanted, fulfilling my wishes, well, my personal ones at most.” You looked down at your hands.

* * *

“If you thought about it, would you ever come to love someone, even if they were a part of the Order you left?” He asked, as you slightly quirked your eyebrows.

“Well, let’s put it this way: If I love someone, and they were willing to put aside the Order’s rules in order to fulfill an emptiness, despite the risks alongside said relationship, then of course.” You answered, glancing to the fire as it began to burn a bit brighter than before.

“So, would it be safe to assume that, even those still in the Jedi Order would be worthy of love from you?” He continued, as you leaned forward in your chair, looking upon the eyes of your friend from adolescence.

“Qui-Gon, what exactly are you implying?” You inquired, as the man looked up, a fire in the both of your eyes, almost rivaling the smoldering blaze in the mantle as your subconscious brought you closer to him.

“I believe, that any man who even merits a love from you, would indeed be the most valuable and lucky man in this plane of existence.” He murmured, almost against your lips. “Just a thought, but would you be so gracious, as to grant me your love, and make me the most blessed man in this galaxy?”

You let out a soft, suppressed laugh as you cupped Qui-Gon’s cheek. “I believe, even after all these years, you have more than merited my devotion.”

And thus, the two souls were binded in a kiss, soft yet passionate, finally releasing the longing and wanting that was built up over so many years.

It’s true that you were a hopeless romantic, that was nothing short of your own desire to leave.

A life of solitude was one you would bear, if not for the man that captured your lips at this very moment, almost frozen in time.

The fire crackled once more, dying down to only a few embers, yet the new fire, ignited by two old flames, brought together once more.


End file.
